High Intensity or Low Intensity

I find it ironic that people of the world fall into one or the other, and yet black and white thinking is frowned upon.

My family and friends call me high intensity and high maintenance. I am fiercely loyal to my friends. I detest small talk. In friendships I do the deep dive, let them see my vulnerable side. Otherwise what’s the point? But I let the vulnerability and my past unfold in its own time.

“A person with an intense personality may experience a wider range of emotions more vividly than others, including both positive and negative emotions. They may also have big opinions, beliefs, and facial expressions, and may react strongly to people, places, and things. When they’re feeling good, they may seem larger than life, but when they’re not, they may come across as melodramatic or attention-seeking. 

People with intense personalities may also have heightened sensory systems, making them more sensitive to their surroundings. They may appreciate sensual pleasures like music, art, and language, but may also have intense reactions to sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touches. This may make them feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable with too much sensory input. For example, they may be sensitive to loud noises, strong smells, or clothing tags.

People who feel intensely might be labeled as highly sensitive, gifted, or having a mental illness. With little awareness, many emotionally intense adults confess to having felt lonely and misunderstood. Signs of being an emotionally intense person include having a grave concern for the wider world.” – Google

All the greats are highly intense – Mozart, Beethoven, Van Gogh (Did you know Starry Night was painted in a mental asylum?), Wagner, Rachmaninov, and many others. I am in good company.

Like I said, I am not the next Chopin nor the next Beethoven, but I am the first Wimbo and better grab you some shades because my future is bright!

(In Swahili, Wimbo means song!)

Extroverts unite!!!

Tally-ho!

Imagination

I absolutely adore stuffed animals esp Disney characters Dory, Hank, Sorcerer Mickey, Minnie, Cheshire Cat, Lucifer the Cat, Bambi, Pascal the list goes on.

I’ve always had a big imagination, able to entertain myself for hours. I teach with toys. I use fidget spinners to teach note duration. My imagination is vast.

Being at a place like Animal Kingdom or Epcot or even Magic Kingdom sparks my imagination like electricity flying loose. Boredom breeds creativity. I’ve written a full fledged musical because I was bored at the hospital. 97 minutes of music and dialogue.

Dad calls my imagination a creative genius. I compare myself to Robin Williams and Walt Disney. On Meyers Briggs I am an ENFP. “These people tend to embrace big ideas and actions that reflect their sense of hope and goodwill toward others. Their vibrant energy can flow in many directions. ENFP personalities carry an interesting blend of carefree sociability, sparkling imagination, and deep, contemplative introspection. They regularly use their natural curiosity and expansive creativity to try to better understand themselves and the complex dynamics of human relationships. And they are truly devoted to nurturing their relationships with and their understanding of the world at large.

In their unique way, ENFPs’ introspective nature is driven by their imagination, wonder, and belief in things that cannot always be explained rationally. People with this personality type truly believe that everything – and everyone – is connected, and they live for the glimmers of insight that they can gain from these connections. They believe that how we treat one another really matters. In fact, ENFPs are the most likely personality type to believe in the concept of karma.

ENFPs are independent and creative, always on the lookout for the magic and meaning in everyday life. They can’t help but ponder the deeper significance of life – even when they should be paying attention to something else.

When something sparks their imagination, ENFPs show an enthusiasm that is nothing short of infectious. These personalities can’t help but to radiate a positive energy that draws other people in. Consequently, they might find themselves being held up by their peers as a leader or guru. However, once their initial bloom of inspiration wears off, ENFPs can struggle with self-discipline and consistency, losing steam on projects that once meant so much to them.”

This fits me to a T.

Robin Williams even said everyone is given a spark of madness and you mustn’t lose it!

I think Imaginations are running far and few between nowadays. Kids five years old have phones and tablets. I had tv time growing up but didn’t have my first phone til I was 16 and it was no touch screen. There’s a time and place for tablets but there’s gotta be a limit. And I say this for me too to preserve my own imagination and so that I may remain a kid at heart. Sometimes apps can teach valuable skills like phonics, math skills, songs, etc. Kids deserve to learn that stuff the old fashioned way too.

Turn off the tablet/phone. Spare the imagination for a few hours today. Use the imagination. Exercise it. It’s like a muscle and only works well when you keep it in prime condition.

My Mitchell Electro-Acoustic Sunburst Guitar and ukuleles

Jesus serenaded by the angels – Bouguereau

Can I just say that guitars are amazing?

You feel the vibrations of the instrument underneath your fingers with the strings and the body vibrates against your belly. Magical experience. I have greatly enjoyed getting to play my Mitchell electro-acoustic sunburst guitar. I have a pair: a guitar and a Uke, both Mitchells. Technically I have 7 ukuleles. Now as I attend school this fall I’ll be getting lessons on both. That has me super stoked.

Music is so magical for me partly because I see my world through patterns and that’s what music is arranged in, patterns especially rhythm. I see fractals everywhere mainly in nature. And then music is mathematical codes and numbers. Not to mention the music of the spheres. Music is a universal language and everybody can access it whether that be playing an instrument, singing in the shower, or listening. It’s something everybody can do. That alone is magical. There’s this painting of an infant Jesus being serenaded by angels by Bougereau. Thus started his early love of music.

Music is everywhere. All you have to do is listen.

Have you ever just wanted to fit in? Like avoid all the drama and blend in with the crowd? From the time I was small, I stood out. My musical abilities were the main cause for that. Here’s a little girl with a big euphonium. Not only that, my teeth were in shackles and my hair was tomboyish.

Why fit in when you were born to stand out? Clearly I was never going to fit in with that crowd. I tested for gifted at age 10. At this point my musical abilities were catapulting into space practically. 1st chairs and section leaders were in my future. Music is my home and was my family at this age. My whole word was viewed in patterns, close to rhythm. And now we know it was ADHD. I can’t slow down my brain enough to think and sort what I want to say, even now as I write this.

My doctor told me I have a neurodivergent brain and you add music and giftedness on top of that. You have something special.

The white light enters my eyes and emerges as rainbow musical magic through everything I do and see and feel and experience.

This is my story.